Charting A Course

It's that time again.

The time where an article pops up on my news feed which is so tempting and so deserving of a click that I click on it. It was titled, " How To Cycle Around The World In 3 Easy Steps - Tom Allen’s Bike Trip"

I don't have to explain why it sounded exciting. I mean, around the word? In three steps?!

Sign me up!

Unfortunately the steps aren't what one might want them to be. Like the Mirror of Erised, everyone will expect three steps that will fit exactly what they were looking for, solutions to the exact problems that they are facing.

The reality is cold and hard, as the advice is pretty much along the lines of telling you to get off your ass and getting out into the world.

Here's where the dilemma starts.

I'm 21 years old. I'm no longer a kid. I have been blessed or born (depending on the readers personal opinions) into a home that has supported and helped me through every desire I have had, morally and financially.

So the thought of giving up everything; just uprooting myself from this life that my parents and my entire family have worked so hard to give me... Well, it just seems wrong.

I know I don't have to uproot myself entirely, nor do I have to vanish forever. But in order to truly be free, to let go of the attachment and really, really cycle without a care. I kind of feel that I have to surrender it all.

Don't get me wrong, if I told my family about this and was able to substantiate the desire, to whatever extent. I'm sure they would have no doubts about saying "go ahead".

But what about my future? As I near the end of my college 'career' I am plagued by the thoughts of what is to come after. Do I run into a job? Which job? Should I be looking at a post-grad? A diploma? In what!? The questions stack up, higher and higher.

Recently we had a workshop in college for Career Charting. The idea being to identify your skills and talents and think about what you would want to be in 5, 10 years and finally when you retire. I had done something similar in December; I basically looked at what I wanted to do with my life. One path lead down Media: Which basically meant photojournalism and possibly full time photography, with a side hobby of films. The other path lead down Politics: It saw me planning to intern at thinktanks, ngos, appearing for the Indian civil services exam and eventually becoming someone who could make a difference in India and the world.

Quite honestly, the latter option was what I ended up hitting. I mean, did I want to be just another person who lived on the planet? Or do I want to make a difference to humanity? Big shoes to fill, but I chose to make a difference.

However, in the last two weeks, I've been handed more responsibilities with some extra work as SC President of my College and I'm questioning everything. The reason for this is simple, working for the benefit of others, is a potentially thankless job. I won't have the exciting and potentially fast paced life that photography might give me, I would be restricting myself tremendously.

So what does one do? When faced with all these parallel paths, how could I find a commonality.

A line that is quoted very often from the poem Invictus is "I am the captain of my soul" and that speaks to me at some level.

As I said, the various paths can be divergent in nature. But if I want to throw myself through the brambles and the thorny bushes between the paths. That's my call to take.

I could do all of this stuff. I could, but how would I?

Off the top of my head, I could go cycling. Get to know the India that exists, if I travelled with my camera, I could take photos and write about my experiences. Maybe I'd get a deal where I can write as I travel, or a book deal. Once that finishes, if I still felt that it was my journey, I could start with the internships at thinktanks and ngos and do the ICS exam. Or I could do something else entirely.

I think it was wrong of me to have tried to tie my life down in such a manner. Life is supposed to be dynamic, exciting, unpredictable and make you feel that you have lived.

If you aren't happy with what you're doing, you're doing something wrong. You need to change it. Thing is, only you can change it.

With the society that we live in today, it's easier, and hence 'better' to stick to the safe things - even if they make you miserable.

But there is hope. I know enough people who have shifted from the things they were successful at, to things they're happy doing. The thing I want to avoid is reaching that point of stagnation and frustration that caused these people to abandon ship. I think it's safe to say that it would be better to chart a course, rather than jump in the blind.

As I think back on what I wrote, I'm thinking "Great! I've totally got this figured out."

Only problem, is that I now have to do it. I don't have to elaborate on how scary it is to move out of your comfort zone...

To that, all I would say is... Little steps. I'll try and inch out of my comfort zone, maybe in a year I'll be ready for this event. At least I'll be done with college!